Flirting is a controversial word that offends our moral sensibilities and causes our hearts to tingle at the same time. ‘Good’ girls don’t want to be seen to be flirts and the ‘bad’ girls are seen to be notorious flirts.
My perspective of flirting is like a car that wants to cross the road or park in an empty lot but is not sure if there is a vacant space. The driver trafficates as a signal of its intention to other motorists and they can either accept the signal and create a chance or ignore it and the driver can wait for another chance or move on. So like that car signaling its intentions, flirting is a way for a woman to signal her intention or interest in a man without saying it out rightly.
Flirting comes naturally for a lot of women because of our nurturing nature; however it has to be managed properly so that you don’t send the wrong message to the man you are trying to catch his attention. Here are some tips on how to flirt in a classy way:
1. Make eye contact: You meet a guy the catches your interest in the mall or the banking hall, why don’t you look up and make eye contact? I know that this can be tough for introverts like myself, but you can imagine that he is a prospective client, and you want to confirm that he is who you think he is. Lol!
2. Smile: This should follow immediately after the eye contact once you like what you see. It could be a slight smile and then you move your eyes away and behave like you are focusing on something else. Or for the more courageous ladies, it could be a wide smile that would lead to a conversation. The conversation could sound like; ‘that book you are holding is what I just finished reading’ or ‘I like your tie it reminds me of something I just saw in a store recently’. You get my drift? Lol!
3. Touch tenderly: don’t touch immediately you meet the person please! That won’t be classy, but somewhat desperate. However once you hang out or meet up somewhere else, the touch can start gradually. It could be from wiping out a ‘stain’ on his shirt (not his trousers please o because that’s like you are heading to his….), to a slight brush on his arms when you exchange an object with him. This should generate the right amount of electricity to get the hormones working and show if the attraction is mutual.
4. Laugh at his jokes: men also love attention and one of the things that give him increased confidence is when you can laugh at his jokes. It turns him on when he sees you laughing and it also signals to him that he could make you happy if he can make you laugh!
A note of warning; don’t pretend if you are really not feeling him because you might not be able to carry on pretending for a long time. If you haven’t felt anything by now to confirm your initial attraction, honey this is not going anywhere…. Move your car out of the parking lot!
5. Show kindness and concern: in the heart of every grown man, he still wants the love and attention his mama gave him. What does this have to do with flirting? Believe a lot! This is one of the most classy ways of telling him ‘I got your back like your mamma did and I am sexy also’ lol! When you show concern for his challenges or fears, it allows him to be vulnerable to you and signals to him that you might be a woman he can trust and rely on for a long time.
Those are my tips on classy ways to flirt. Did I miss anything? Please share your thoughts and subscribe below so you can receive my upcoming e-book on becoming more attractive to men.
Tale Alimi the author of the new ebook Attracting Mr Right, Becoming Mrs Right. Get a copy via her website thefivestarwoman.com